AS A CHILD, I WAS
This piece is all about childhood
and the uplifting freedom,
that is naturally felt, in this life stage.
It was created with a lightness of application,
a spontaneity & joy in the process.
Allowing expression in its varying forms is vital, in not suppressing all that we can become.
Many of us were taught to suppress our emotions. Bottling up the so-called undesirable, uncomfortable expressions and as a result, denied parts of ourselves. Storing these suppressed emotions in our bodies to later reveal themselves as anger, hurt, resentment, feelings of unworthiness and in turn ailments or dis-ease.
I am continually working on accepting and embracing all sides of who;
my child is,
my partner is, and
who I am.
I can admit, I still struggle at the sound of my son being upset. For wanting what he cannot have, the backchat in fighting for his cause and the crying that follows when he simply does not understand or accept the outcome.
I work daily on building patience so that he can release his upset, without firing up with impatient and hurtful words. Just to swiftly silence his discomfort or sadness, so that 'I' do not feel the pain of his upset or so that 'I' can achieve my desired outcome. He is a reflection of me.
And then there are times where you see that Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde side to your kid's personality. Where they manage to regulate their emotions from despair to joy in a matter of seconds. (As you glance at your partner like 'WTF!?' or in disbelief 'was he faking it?'.) When this happens, let's take a leaf from our young one's book. As it is a skilful ability to; release, clear, free themselves of their distress so swiftly. They allowed it to move through them and move on.
W45 x H120cm image size | acrylic mixed media on canvas in open grain, charcoal floating frame
So here I am, endeavouring to retrain my default reactions, allowing those moments to course through me and move on. Hopefully, through example, teaching my little one that we can let the emotion wash over us, we have the time, and as quickly as it arose, permit it to leave our bodies. Releasing all feelings of resentment, weightiness, guilt of the past or present, and travel through this life with lightness, ease of breath, head and shoulders held high.
By harnessing, instead of shaming or quashing, that spark-filled (intense) moment…
we learn and teach the life skills of; diffusing the charge, patience, understanding both of ourselves and of others.